lovely lies

it was my fault

for ever believing your


but man,

were they beautiful.


i discovered

i wasn’t sculpted

nor molded for you.

i tried to contort myself into

the shape of your laugh

and love

and beauty but i found myself

unable to reach for it all.

it was not your fault

nor was it mine.

i catch myself thinking of a million ways it all could of worked out,

if only i could–

if only i was–

but i could not and

i was not

and that’s okay.

music in my head

you know those songs that linger with you throughout the day

because they meant something when you didn’t have the words to say it?

those are my favorite songs,

they are my voice.

reality is much nicer when i have this music in my head,

it’s much softer and understanding.