baby, believe me

my words might come out as simple as sugar

but baby,

they mean the world in all its richness. 

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the kind robber 

he wants to know what’s behind the door of my most caged in thoughts,

sound the alarm!

he’s gotten in.

my heart is no longer a secure vault,

it’s security system has been temporarily disarmed,

and i allow him to linger.

i don’t wish to keep those doors shut, 

instead, i want to be somewhat of an open book so he can take his time reading the drawn out tales and lullabies,

get to know me.

and i go crazy over the unraveling of our minds,

i crave his intellect and introspect just as much as he craves mine.

so i guess i can’t blame him for opening doors that have been sealed for ages,

he’s curious about what’s inside.

and i’m curious to know what he will think of what is left to salvage.

i wait for Jesus 

i’ve been sinking on the low,

cradling my broken pieces in between bent arms,

trying to figure out what i’m going to do with them.

but i forgot that i didn’t have to figure it out alone,

because along with the puzzle, my heart was a riddle Einstein wouldn’t have the brains to solve.

i forgot who went before me,

followed behind me,

and in desperate times, carried me.

He knows my heart and has solved the riddle ages ago,

now we are both waiting:

i wait for him to show me what my eyes cannot see 

he waits for me to realize that he is all that i need. 

i wait for Jesus.

let me see Jesus. 

umoving

i can’t see clearly right now,

my heads a blur that is not giving my heart any heads up,

and now my heart has fallen into a pit without warning. 

i am not myself,

more like a “stuck in time” version of me,

i am frozen in my fear,

unmoving.

there’s a bulldozer headed my way, they call it dangerous and destructive,

i’ve embraced the scare.

though i’m still scared.