silence has always come naturally

i’m so bad at talking to people,

my feelings get stuck in my throat.

they ask me what’s wrong and i

rush to persuade them that i

am the best i’ve ever been,

even if i’m hurting on

the inside.

it’s how i’m made,

it’s why i take much easier to pen and paper.

the paper does not have to understand me,

it only has to absorb the ink i’m bleeding.

and for that, i am grateful for such a companion.


yeah, but you’re lonely.

no i’m not…

i’m great.

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it sounds selfish to me

is it selfish to

want things they can’t give to you?

it’s not that they lack anything.

they just don’t fill up your cup,

they don’t leave you full.

3 a.m Q&A

if i ask you a question

at 3 a.m

please forgive me for the weight of my words.

i’ve been intoxicated by my coffee and poetry

and the music has been circulating through my veins.

at this time of night,

my tongue is controlled by my heart

and

i blurt out words i know i should hold back.

i am grateful for the ache

to every ache that rattled my veins:

i should not have let you steal from me,

i should not have let you dig your hands into my soul.

but,

thank you for showing me that i am strong.

because of you,

i have learned how to fall on my knees and pray.

you meant to drown me,

but i was already drowning in Gods grace.

thank you,

pain.

hurt.

confusion.

sorrow.

thank you for pointing me to my savior.